Christmas Disasters!

My commiserations to all, and a full and speedy recovery, Nick.

J Hancock - The mind boggles. Was the mixer falling or a projectile?

My Christmas was odd as the first I'd ever spent alone even though my sisters' homes are within easy walking distances (their own families come first); but I didn't waste it and the bright sunshine. While the washing was drying on the line, I finished the shaping operations on a part for my T&C Grinder.

One thing all this enforced circles has brought out, (apart from my refusing to call what have always been social and family circles, ' bubbles ' )  is just how extended even a fairly small family can become once the brood has fledged. I have no issue, as they might say in more exalted circles, but am an Uncle and Great-Uncle several times. I think it's rather easy to overlook not the people themselves, but the extent of the spread-out web of relatives, nephews'/nieces' girl/boy-friends / spouses, and their parents, and so on. Then along comes a spot of acid wrapped in protein to wreak havoc on mankind, and all of a sudden the web and its structure are to the fore.

'

Great-Uncle... First time I was told this, by my sister (the new Grandma), I said being called "Great-Uncle Nigel" makes me sound as if a Womble.

Edited By Nigel Graham 2 on 29/12/2020 22:55:50

The disasters that come to mind were not at Christmas time, but disasters all the same.

1 ) As an Apprentice, in digs, landlady mistook salt for caster sugar. The custard was inedible, as you may imagine!

2 ) New wife put dessert in a Tupperware dish, under the grill. Encapsulated sponge cake anyone?

3 ) Ditto, put Tupperware dish in saucepan to heat. Allowed to boil dry. Took ages with a cup brush in the Black and Decker to clean up the saucepan!

And then were only two of those dishes given as wedding presents!

Still need to fit gauge glasses to the saucepans, or lead plugs! (Not safe on gas )

And don't ask to list the threads cut with the wrong changewheels!

Howard

Xmas was quiet just the two of us, wife and I, because we are now in Tier 4. Today I was being a good boy and doing some housework, went to use the handheld battery operated Dyson vacuum cleaner and it ran for 30 seconds and then ran out of battery, I knew it should have been fully charged as I had just taken it off it’s charging platform, and yes the charger had been connected and switched on, in fairness the battery had been rapidly declining of late, provisional enquiries on pricing a replacement battery are about £60. To compound our vacuum cleaner woes we also have a Bosch upright battery cleaner and that is showing signs of battery distress, enquiries on the price of a replacement battery are that because it is a super duper 20.5 volt battery then price is £140, I consider that a staggering price for a clutch of lithium ion cells taped together and stuffed in a plastic enclosure, most likely made in China and sold wholesale for a pittance. So if we go into lockdown someday soon I will have some repairs to keep me occupied.
Dave W

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No, No, NO ! 20.4v /1.2 = 17 Nimh cells ! Not Li ion ! Li ion cells are 3.7v. 20.5/3.7 = 5.54, They don't cell part cells ! If you want advice on this PM me. Noel.

Not what you want on Christmas Eve.

But that night a lovely man came out on his own and replaced it without help and in the dark.

Not Santa but he could have been. (Not me either not at 79)

Howard -

A cautionary tale of woe, though not Christmas related, I recall from your Cock-up Number 3)

And yes that smiley is a deliberate one for a change.

Many moons and Christmases back I was on a caving weekend in Derbyshire, stopping in a local club's rather remote cottage. It had character - electricity from a vintage diesel generating set in an outhouse; and reputedly but not proven the stainless-steel tray acting as sink was an ex-mortuary item. So perhaps in keeping, the pots and pans, especially frying-pans, appeared to be of graphite.

My group returned from our own caving trip to find a rather frosty atmosphere among our hosts. It transpired one member had arrived mid-afternoon, found himself alone so decided to decarbonise the frying-pans. With a wire-brush in an electric drill. Only, he didn't quite finish the task. As one member ruefully remarked about the steak he'd been anticipating,

"It was so covered in aluminium, I couldn't even give it to my dog! "

'

As for wrong change-wheels, my Harrison lathe has a special Thread Cock-up Feature. Its power-feeds and lead-screw are both driven from the change-wheels through a 3-speed gear-box. Took me a long time to discover it wasn't my arithmetic....

Round about 2009 I was putting in a heating system. All fashionable mod cons, it centred on a multi-coil water cylinder that would take excess heat from the wood burning stove, whilst being able to take heat from a gas boiler and solar panels. Top and bottom electric heaters provide back up.

Unfortunately i didn't read the building regulations until after I had ordered the stove, so I had to half demolish and rebuild the chimney breast.

This took a considerable time. Obviously the stove had a wet back so the radiators and expansion tank had to be installed, as did the huge new cold water tank in the loft.

So its now Christmas eve and I am installing the wondrous water tank when I feel very unwell.

So I take to my bed with flu.

No hot water. No heating. For several days. I wasn't popular.

Christmas Day I was in bed with severe shingles. Visitors for Christmas were cancelled, but we managed roast pork dinner for just wife and me. Still in bed.

2019 Christmas, my beloved dog was in vet hospital with acute autoimmune thrombocytopenia. Despite blood transfusion and surgery things went from bad to worst and I called it on Christmas Day and put her down, brought her home and buried her. $12,500 for dead dog. The most I have ever spent on a car was $8000. Setting up the workshop cost $6500 initially for lathe, mill and grinder.

I am not looking forward to next Christmas!

On Christmas Eve I stopped by the local road block (NSW-Vic border) and told the policeman a joke about why the Indian cricketers could not be infected by the corona virus (they cannot catch anything that comes from a bat).

Poiceman pulled down his facemask, yep, he was of Indian descent. OMG, how embarassing!

Roll on just a few days later and instead of Indian, insert Australian cricketers and the joke still works.

Next time I am stopped at the road block I shall just answer "My mum told me never to talk to strangers"

If you never hear from me for a while it's maybe because I am in gaol. Do prisoners get internet access?

* danny *

Hi Noel

I stand corrected, was under the impression the battery was Li ion, checked the vacuum cleaner and it is Nimh, doesn’t change the price they are asking though, will pm you.

Dave W